when i think about it sometimes, the back of my throat starts to quiver. my stomach begins to writhe. it makes me so angry. but the anger comes second, and the thing that comes first is what's been evading me all this time.

sylvia plath talks about pouring herself into other people; i do the same. i give people an important piece of myself when i love them, but they wander off with it and they never give it back. or worse, they reject it.

first, the abandonment. then, the anger. then, the despair.

then, blind hope. then, repeat.

Well I had a wonderful Christmas. I don't think I'm doing anything tonight, and that's alright with me. At least it will be drama free, unlike the past several years.
I'm very happy about this four day weekend. I woke up at 1:00pm today-- feels so great to sleep in!
Dolce is doing well. He's in his biting stage though. So, I bought a little spray bottle to startle him when he's biting my hand, foot, or leg. Hopefully he learns from this!!

I truly hope 2010 is better than the last few tremendously shitty years.

Everyone have a marvelous New Years and a successful 2010! <3